How do I get my ex back after 4 months of No Contact?
My ex broke up with me in January after about a year together. I was 19 (since turned 20) and he was 25. When we met, we started dating two days later - our attraction was instant and he is still the love of my life.
We were very happy throughout the href='http://adolfgq.posterous.com/crate-training-i-videod-her-and-she-is-stress'>relationship - we barely fought, rarely had problems. However, in November, I started to get very insecure. I was unhappy with my school life (I am a theatre major and want to be an actor. I was starting to do a lot of stage management, and I was extremely unhappy with it - I hated it but didn't know how to get out of it...I was so, so miserable. To top it off, my parents started having intense fights, and I would get phone calls while at college about them and get fought with and stuff like that...it was hard). I didn't tell him about it because I didn't want to stress him out anymore (which was weird, because we told each other everything)
During Winter Break, I was just a wreck - every time I thought about going back to school, I would get so scared and angry - and then there was always another fight going on with my parents (I live at home during breaks). Whenever that happened, I would push him - like fight him on nothing, or not tell him I love him so he would say it more. I wanted to get a rise out of him so I felt better about myself - so I would push him to make me feel better. I even tried to break up with him once because I knew he would push to stay with me. I HATE myself for what I did - I was just a needy, insecure ***** who didn't deserve him.
When January came around and I started doing more Stage Management, I was even more miserable than before. I got in a large fight over him not wanting to wait for dinner - and he broke up with me, rightly so. He should have - I was horrible. After about two weeks of trying to get him to come talk to me, I started No Contact. We haven't talked since.
For a long time, I was convinced he broke up with me because he was an *******. I am in pretty intense counseling, but I think I've worked through a lot of my issues. I stopped doing Stage Management, started acting more, stopped picking up the phone when my parents called, got new housing for the summer, and am actually really happy for the first time. I have great new friends that I got because of the breakup, and I very much enjoy who I am right now. The only thing missing is him.
How do I break NC and start talking to him again to get him back? He is not with anyone - all he really does is like sext a bunch of random girls from his new school - he hasn't found anyone else. I know I screwed up and there has to be a way to show him that I'm better - I've worked on my issues, and I want him back.